November 16th, 2009
A couple days ago a gentleman called in an order. He was an occasional smoker and needed a detox drink to pass his test. He had taken one before and it made him pass, so he was quite confident that he would pass this time, too.
“Yeah, I took it the last time, and followed all the instructions, and went to the bathroom like five times, and I passed! So, I want the same thing.”
It was clear that the customer knew how to use the product and was certain of the results he should expect, but it is a standard procedure just to say it out loud once again, this way we are sure to be on the same page.
“Consume it approximately two hours before your test, urinate several times and your urine will be free of toxins for the next 3-5 hours. Also, make sure that you stay away from any kind of toxins for at least 48 hours before the test day, including second hand smoke.”
“ Oh, yeah, I know. But actually, it is for a saliva test. Last time I thought it was going to be urine, like they do usually, but when I showed up there they said they changed it to a saliva test! Thank God I was prepared!”
“Sir, detox drinks do not work for saliva testing. How long have you been clean before the test day last time?”
“For about a week. But that drink made me pass last time! I’m pretty sure that was the drink! What do you mean – it doesn’t work for urine???”
“Sir, any drinks are meant to help you with a urine test, not a saliva test. For the latter there is a toxin-cleansing mouthwash, or effervescent tablets if you’re not sure which one of the two you’re going to have. When is your next test?
“… Tomorrow afternoon…”
“And when was the last time you smoked?”
“Eghh …last night…”
His confidence seemed to be disappearing by the minute.
“Ok, what made you pass your test last time wasn’t the drink but the time of abstaining. THC doesn’t stay in your saliva for too long, so only a recent use can be detected in this type of test. You’re going to have to use a toxin-cleansing mouthwash before your test tomorrow, and that’s going to make your saliva clean for the next thirty minutes.”
“OK, I’ll get the mouthwash, but can I also have a drink, just in case? I will be more comfortable if I have that, even though it might not work for me.”
We agreed on that.
A couple days later I got a message that this gentleman called back saying that he had passed his test thanks to the mouthwash, and was happy that he could test himself after he took a drink just to make sure that it is the wrong product for him.